Awkward and Awesome Thursday!

Awesome:
I get to see my sister and her five kids today!
My good friend Kim Miles is getting married today!
Saw a meter shower last night, it was awesome!

Awkward:
Being at FHE for the first time and had to draw Steve Young...... which is not a black football player. Whoops. Nothing like embarrassing myself to really make the ward like me!!

Forgetting the names of the new people you meet, and then calling them the wrong name the whole day! Sorry for that Austin.... I swear I thought your name was andrew!

Having a new roommate walk in while you are doing butt stretches in the front room.

Moving Day!

So its starting! I am going to move tomorrow!!!
I have basically been packing up all week. I quit one of my jobs just so I had time to do it all so instead of working 60 hours a week I am down to a measly 20!
So who know crap can accumulate into so much stuff. Seriously thought I have five, count it FIVE, boxes of cloths and then another suit case full, that is even after giving a butt load away and sending bags off to the DI. I have an addiction and I know that. I actually even called my sister down to my room to shake me to my senses and make me give stuff up. Its a problem.
Anywho life has been great! I went to Nauvoo with my family and that was just wonderful! ( post on that later) After Nauvoo I have basically just been with the family doing family things, which leads me to my next point.
Moving is hard! and no I am not talking about packing up boxes and getting a sweaty moving things around.  I am talking about the emotional weening I go through every year with them. I leave, then go back for four months, then leave again. Not sure how I like this.
I put on my big girl panties and leave home, and just as I feel comfortable- they come off again.
I am not sure if other people are like this-struggle so much to leave their parents behind. I think its because I am the youngest- and I had my parents all to myself for three years so its hard!
But beside the emotional hardness I am ready to get back! I am ready not be working all the time and ready to see my friends again. I am ready to start school and jump back into things again. I may hate moving but it is exhilarating! that is for sure.

The Dreaded Freshmen Fifteen

So my whole life I have always struggled with weight problems. Now I am not sure if someone can gain 30 pounds in a day but I am pretty sure I did- puberty hit and BAM I had body issues especially since most of the girls in my grade were size 00 all through high school. Dang it all.
But back with the story ....
Growing up I was always "encouraged" to exercise, eat healthier, and well try to get to a healthier weight but did I... nope, way to stubborn to do what my parents and siblings all said I should do.

 I was active in sports and things, but those did not seem to help when it came to my weight.

Senior year was probably the worse- I was under a lot of stress ( two jobs, senior class president, college, you know the whole shaabang that goes along with growing up) 
and the problem kept on excellerating. By the way whoever thought the whole white graduation robe thing was a good idea should be admitted into an asylum, but thats beside the point. Anyway until the summer before I went to college I was very big doing nothing about it.
So this is how it all happened. One day I just woke up and was like, hmmm I really hate being fat. Maybe I should stop blaming my other misfortunes on my weight and just change it. You can change this thing you hate about yourself.  So thats what I did. I started running. I ran everyday about three miles, did interval training, push ups, sit ups, I changed my whole veiw on excercise, but did not have many results.


Then I went to college- sick with worry I was going to gain the freshmen fifteen, I went into a health frenzy. I excersiced and hour to two a day along with eating very well. Started weighing myself, taking measurements, reading a lot of health books and magazines trying to absorb as much as I could. Lucky me my hard work did pay off.

I am proud to say that I did "The freshmen fifteen" but who woulda thought that it went the other way!

In a series of six months I lost twenty pounds, went down two sizes, and just gained a whole lot of confidence in myself and knowing that putting your mind to anything really does make a huge difference. It was not easy- trust me, the weight gained 7 years ago did not want to go off, but eventually it did come off! Sweat and hard work does win in the end.

So a year later... I went through this whole life changing experience and I am back in the same town, same job, and same lifestyle that caused me to gain the weight in the first place.


Reason for the post- its been extremely hard being back again. I am surrounded by fatty unhealthy food all day long and working 12+ a day does not want to make a girl wanna exercise. Thus I am writing to encourage and remind myself of the past.


But this time round I am different with a different frame of mind. I love exercise, eating well, and feeling wonderful and I have the ambition to keep to it (with the help of a wonderful gym membership) Still got a good ten pounds to go, but slowly and surely it will come.


side note: all those double 00s in high school all totally gained that fifteen pounds.... and then some :S
oh I also have before and after pictures. Will post later.

Family Time

So with my current lifestyle of working- a lot, its been hard for me to have a life outside of work. I am working two jobs right now, as a secretary and a manger/waitress at a local restaurant. I very much so like my job. I work with wonderful people and I always have fun stories about the crazy happenings as a waitress ( those will come later). But with all this craziness of working 50-60 hours per week I find it hard to have a life.
Moving back home for the summer I jumped in knowing that I would not have a social life this summer. Most of my friends are gone, either married or on missions, I have on really really good friend and we hit the occasional movie, Ps Green Lantern... ya wait till red box. Anywho with this absence of a life I have made it more of a priority to be with family, and well I can proudly say I hang out with my parents every night. Yes thats right people your looking at a good ol' mammas girl and daddy's darling. My mom actually got mad at me today for watching TV with someone else- fair warning to my future hubby there will be jealousy issues :)

The happenings of my life meaning moving out, brother getting married, sister in Afghanistan, and especially sending a niece to heaven have all taught me the importance of family. I guess I just never realized how short life really is- things can change in an instance and well its important too make the MOST important things a priority. That is my family.

                                                                    aren't they adorable! 

So my new goal is to focus a lot of my time and energy on family. It just makes me sad that its takin this long for me to be able to realize it! 

oh ps. I LOVE being an Aunt- here are just a few of my adventures with my willing minions. 

future post on Kids say the darnest things. 

Awsome and Awkward Thursday!

AWKWARD!
Having old men hit on you so that you will give them an extra cookie- kinda fun though I wonder if I gave them 2 extra cookies if they would shake or sit for me.... hmmm

Telling a boy employee that it his turn to clean out the tampon box, oh sorry excuse me the sanitary napkin box.

Flamboyantly raising my hand to answer a question in Institute, then realizing it is rhetorical...whoops what do you mean you don't wanna know about my private and personal life? my bad

Going to the gym and then seeing a guy that you used to sorta date, and not wanting to talk to him so then you hid from the guy by switching to a machine that is in the corner... then he totally catching you in the act of dodging him, not my finest moment


AWESOME!

Although those old men hit on me to get a cookie, they still tell me " Gee your a cute little thing!" Being called cute is always awesome

Finding out that the $1500 scholarship you received works for HAIR SCHOOL! Yippie!

Jumping on the tramp and playing Uno with my nieces and nephew

Being on TV!!!! more like I was just exercising in the background while the girl said great things about the gym I go to... but hey its still tv! and then receiving a FREE smoothie for being willing to be on TV


For those who dont know Awesome and Awkward started by this blog and well I love it! so there was my inspiration

oh the Love of Idaho!

So my family thinks I have this whole hate rep on Idaho, so me being the always right younger sibling I am writing to prove them wrong. So I am going to dedicate this post on the things I love and the oh so slightly annoyingfrustratingandaggitating things that I dislike about Idaho.

Slightly Dislike

• The awful manure smell that seems to stay for months at a time during harvest
• The Idaho hair poof (for all those girls that like square shaped heads and pricey jeans)
• That small town means news travels fast, don't screw up in this town cause everyone will know about it by the end of the night.
• The social scene, ya it probably kept me out of trouble in high school but now being a single adult the scene is dry... very dry.

LOVE!

• I love the country part of Idaho, call me a hick... its okay because I love that I can go bike riding on ditch banks, or that I grew up swimming in the canal (for all those city folk out there that is basically the ditch the farmers use to irrigate their farms).
  
• I love that I spent my childhood barefoot- seriously though talk about calused feet!
  
• I love that everyone is so friendly and not a day goes by that a stranger doesn't wave to me driving down the road.
• I love the amazing people here- so loving! I feel like I have a million cheerleaders rooting for me to do well in life.
• I love the crickets outside and that my dog could always roam around with me.
• I love that I am surrounded by a river and mountain ranges- all fun to play on! Activities range from boating, snowmobiling, sledding, tubing, rafting, swimming, hiking, and of course skiing.
• Lastly I love seeing the amazing sunsets every night and then seeing all the stars right after!

taken right outside my window


Most arguments against small towns are that they are uncultured. Did I grow up going to the art exhibit or newest museum or touring the local zoo. Nope I never did any of that. Never did I go to a rock concert or the local club.
But I did grow up singing songs while hoeing the beat fields, helping my brother milk cows, and spending most days playing boardgames with my family. Lucky me I grew up learning the value of hard work while cementing close relationships with my wonderful family. Sorry city folk but I think I got the better end of the deal ;)

A Glorious Wedding

So hair school- big whoop right, why else haven't I been writing. Well a lot those reasons are because of my wonderful family, and can I just say I am the luckiest girl in the world. I have the best family. Anywho....

My big brother ( aka my partner in crime growing up) and my best friend ( girl who stole my identity) got hitched!! Thats right- best friend and big brother, how lucky am I!! Not a lot of people can say that their best friend married into their family- the only downside to this destined duo is that well my best friend's name is Melissa- and as you guessed it, the world now has two Melisa/ssa Monroes- who knew there was room for another one :)

May 6 was such a wonderful day- full of love and a good ol' dose of stress caused by doing the brides hair, pickup up family members, getting the flowers, parking tickets, and of course watching 10 kids ( three of them being less then 1 years old) at the temple grounds. But oh it was worth it when the couple stepped out of the temple and their eyes gleaming of honest and true love ( which, if your around for a while it gets kinda nauseating). Well the day followed with pictures, videos, and lots of hugs and kisses- between the bride and groom.


They are now living in Illinois for the summer and let me tell you it has been hard to not see them. Melissa and I are very close, and well all three of us share jokes that not everyone else thinks is funny. I know that from personal experience. Its definitely hard not to have Melissa ten steps away- and I find myself missing the both of them quite a bit.

I don't know if I can express the happiness I feel for my brother and friend. They have such a fun spirit about them- both of them can make me giggle at moments notice. They have found something special, something real- and well it brings me such joy to see them together.

Congrats Jordan and Melissa- I sure love you!

Switching things up

So I first started this blog- as I said a spiritual blog, and I fully intend on talking about spiritual things, but I also love writing so thus I have decided to switch things up- this blog is going to be about me and well my life and express a lot of the crazy thoughts to which I think:

and let me tell you- they are random, crazy, and mostly funny thoughts

So welcome- welcome to my life

Its been a while....

So, Hello there once again- I am sorry I have not written or updated this blog, and I promise its not because I got horribly injured- sadly my oh so very pathetic excuse to not writing is because... ready... duh dut dada... I have been BUSY!
Finals, moving, working, and well family matters have all kept me from writing- well don't fret because I am back and wow has my life changed a lot in the last couple of months.
Update-
I passed all of my finals with flying colors- as well as getting a pretty good GPA at BYU, and well you know what I did with that great sense of accomplishment of conquering BYU ( well sorta, cause its not like I graduated) yup that's right people- I changed schools. Well more like I am going to hair school- Taylor Andrews Academy to be exact. What brought on this change you might ask- well a lot of things really. I have always loved doing hair and have been really passionate about it, and it wasn't until I went to college that I realized that I really had a knack for it. But before I could make the big leap to going to hair school I had to do/realize a lot of things.
First, I had to go to college. I had to prove to myself that I could do college, that with my hard work that I could get good grades and be successful in it. Second, I had to realize that I really was good at hair- that I had a hidden talent. And well last- I had to realize that I was not stupid or shorting myself by going to hair school. So after all happened I started researching. Figuring out tuition, expenses, hiring rates, rating schools, and basically just seeing if it was even possible, and guess what... it is :) I ended up finding a huge scholarship- 1/2 tuition ( $ 8,000 ) for this school and well everything, and I mean EVERYTHING fell into place. I am going to a very pristine and high class place that has all good programs that I want as well as good people. I am so excited. So ready to do what I really want and not look back at what people say or think- cause well I am doing this for me and for my future and I am SOOO excited to jump- not leap into this new adventure.

Lifes a little funny....

Lately I have been having some lower back pain along with some pretty weird dreams and I decided it was my bed causing this distress. So today I pulled off my really really comfortable foam topper that was on top of my bed, and have been sleeping on the good ol' hard college mattress.

I love sleep. sleep and me we get along well. So naturally I thought a foam mattress would help me sleep EVEN better. I BEGGED my mother for that foam mattress for the longest time. And my mom does not buy things like that for just some random reason, it has to be for a special occasion and so Christmas, Graduation, and FINALLY my birthday and I got this beautiful, soft foam mattress and it was going to be perfect for me to take to college. Well who knew that this foam mattress which I thought was going to be sooooo good for me, ended up hurting me. Something I thought was going to help me and change me, ended up, actually making things worse.

I find it funny that things that I thought I needed sooo badly, I ended up not needing at all. They actually ended up hurting me more then providing that great Help that I thought it would provide. I have actually seen this happen to me a lot in life. Something I wanted SOO bad, and when I finally got it, it ended up being an awful thing for me. Totally right, ended up being totally wrong. Now I am not talking about something silly like bed foam mattresses, but I am talking about friends, boyfriends, family situations, or even some decisions in which you feel is such a big deal at the moment, but in all actuality, its not. To me I find it happening a lot with friends. Friends that I thought I needed and wanted and that I put on this grand pedestal ended up not really being true friends to me at all, they are the ones who probably hurt me the most.

I guess my whole point in this random mess of a blog post is that the Lord knows where you need to be and what is going to help you become who your eternally destined to be. He knows what you REALLY need and what you don't. He knows you. And he is willing to help you know yourself if you would have just let him. I guess for me I just wish I would have turned to the Lord first, instead of trying to figure it out on my own, or asking other advice. I wished I would have asked if it was something I needed to help me progress in this life and enable me to help do the lords work. The end all be all is before you go make any life decisions out there, make sure you consult the one guy who know you the best, your Heavenly Father.

Good Things to Come

After this realization I then found a lot of comfort in this video; touched me to my soul and I hope it does for you as well

Trials

So a couple of weeks ago I found myself pretty bummed. Bummed because life was not going how it was planned. I was failing in school, friends were not being actual good friends, and well the boy department is yet to go my way. I was homesick, and all I wanted was a hug from my mommy. ( trust me I am rarely like that) Well so I guess you could say that I was in a funk. a bad funk. one that was not going to leave for a long time. Life sucked, and I was just going to wallow in my own self pity for a while. That was until I read an email from my sister in law. Here is some background on my sister in laws new life and the trials she has to go through.

On January 11, 2010 a precious baby girl was born on this earth into a loving family, of parents and three siblings. Beautiful dark curly hair, piercing blue eyes, and a lovely smile to show all who came into contact with her. Sadly, that same day she was life flighted to St. Lukes hospital for testing. The doctors saw a breathing problem and wanted to get it checked out. Three days later, probably the longest three days of my life, after little baby Mallory had been poked, prodded, and sticked, they found out that she had "smooth brain syndrome" where the brain doesn't develop fully. She would never be able to walk, talk, or do anything function wise. Her feet would have to be in braces for the rest of her life, a feeding tube was inserted in her nose, and eventually put in her stomach. My brothers little family had received a huge blessing and huge trial all at the same time. This was such a heartbreaking time for my family. It was and still is a hard experience.

My sister in law, well I more just think of her as my sister because we are that close, she does not complain or want pity for this baby in her life. She works through it daily and their family takes it one day at a time.
I was on the Internet one day, during the week of having a pity party for myself and I came across this message she wrote to my other sister. She had strep, the whole family had strep, and well it was a hard time in her life. Here is just a bit of what she said.
"Ya, things are busy all the time, but as long as I am healthy it is doable. I know that we don't say a lot about Mal's Day to day but she doesn't have an easy life, not even a comfy life. And I can deal with my physical stress of 2 hours of sleep a night of getting sick a little more often then I used to, but its the emotional part that gets to me. I got strep this weekend, Matt was on call for 26 hours, and I had a fever of over 100.... so needless to say I was a little off my game. Mallory (and all my family for that matter) relyes on me a lot. When our routine is off, our life is off. It is really hard to see my little girl struggle so much to live. She sounds like she is drowning a lot of nights, especially when she is sick, and all I can do is hold and sing to her and suction the crap out to try to make it less work to breath. She is a sweetie, and I would love to be able to fix her breathing and swallowing. I can handle the "handicapped" part, but it just doenst make sense that a little person has to suffer so much just to do the "easy stuff". People ask me a lot why we never say anything or complain, but it is really hard and we dont say much. It is mostly because we feel blessed to have our life."

Reading this email put me in my place. How could I complain of my feeble and pathetic life when people so close to me are silently suffering, going through probably one of the hardest trials on the face of this planet. It made me realize that in all actuality life is not that bad. I have a family who loves me, friends who try to be there for me, a knowledge of the gospel that is so true and fulfilling. I have the Lord, Jesus Christ, who went to the ends of the earth for me. Who bled from every pore for ME to live on this life. I need to take advantage of the magnificent blessing and cherish every moment on this earth. I might let life get me down sometimes, but at least I have a working body and a wonderful life to live. Mallory is such a blessing in my life. She makes me appreciate the little things and love the wonderful things. Its amazing how one little girl can impact the world so much.

Weeds and Thunder Storms

Well I think before I tell you my spiritual experiences, I should first briefly state some more things about me. I am a Freshmen in college at Brigham Young University... Yes that is right people I am a Mormon. Well I was always told that the first year of college is always the hardest. Being on your own is awful and that everyone has problems. Me, being the "not as humble as I should be" person that I am thought that my first year of college would go off with out a hitch. I would have "some" problems, but those problems would not effect me as much as it did to others because I am a mature grown up adult who was raised right, with good standards, a smart family, and well I honestly thought I would be blooming in college.

In a sense I was right, I did bloom, but little did I know that with that blooming came some hardcore weeds and thunder storms that would cause hurt, pain, and a bit of depression. Most of these weeds and thunder storms were things that never in my mind I could of predicted. Never in my wildest dreams would I be faced with these trials and tribulations.

I think that is how life is most of the time, things happen that we would never expect or predict or fathom ever happening to us. In a manner of seconds, minutes, hours, or days our lives can change. and we can be faced with different "lightning" in the distance... but back to the point.

As I found myself facing these weeds and storms (of which you will find out more about later) I always seemed to ask the question why. Why was this happening to me, why was it ME going through this, What did I do to deserve this? Well I can now say that I have an answers to those questions of mine and it is this simple concept: We are given trials to grow. We are given tribulations to develop. We have to go through hard times to see good times. Sometimes the Lord is just reminding us and telling us to go unto him. Seek him and his guidance in your life.

And one more concept, some food for thought, Blessings do not always equal happiness or joy. Sometimes blessings are the medicine we need, and sometimes a blessing is a trial. A blessing is good for us, whether that good be though a ray of sunshine or down right hard weedy growing.

To Start Out

In my religion class here at Brigham Young University we were asked to complete a project. Now this project was open to all of us. This project in a nutshell is suppose to be something that develops your own testimony of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. It is suppose to bring you closer to him and help you be a little better.

So I have this wide range of everything and anything that I want to do for my project. My wheels started turning and I love music and I love the lord, so my first thought was to make my own slideshow of depictions of the Savior and sing the music in the background. Now this idea was brilliant! yet it was not something that was going to stretch my testimony, it was not going to be something that helped me grow and develop and become a stronger witness of Christ.

Thus the conclusion of this epic yet pitfall of a story is that I decided to blog. I want to be able to write down my life, spiritual moments ( ones that are not too personal to share) and share the tender mercies that happen each and everyday of my life. Now I am warning you. If you are a person who is uncomfortable about spiritual things or feel weird about it, stop reading now. This blog is for me. Well its for me and you but it is for me to grow and for me to develop into my potential as a daughter of our Heavenly Father

This blog is also for you... well if you want it to be for you.

So there it is.